Stegman Online

Professionals... real professionals...
Happy October everyone! I feel like I've just come alive with this cooler weather- I am so not a hot weather person... lol. The leaves on the trees that line the path to school are turning glorious shades of gold and orange- I'll try to take some pictures soon! There's just something about autumn that I find incredibly inspiring.

I got back the last of my recent exams- I'm happy to relate that with the Lord's assistance, I have successfully passed my first round of vet school exams. It's very satisfying really- sort of a small confirmation that I'm doing the right thing. God is so amazing in the ways that He lets us know that we're in His will, how very great is His love and mercy towards us. The last few days, and today in particular some colleagues of mine and I were discussing the idea of professionalism. We're constantly drilled about how we will be set apart from the rest of the work force in that we are not "career" people, we are "professionals". In other words, we will be veterinarians 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, not just between the hours of 8-5, monday through Friday. Being a professional means abiding by certain guidelines and rules, regardless of who sees us. It means being an example to others, being a leader in our communities. This tied into a discussion of ethics, how part of being a professional was always, without exception, doing the "morally correct thing". One thing that has been striking me is how closely these concepts, professionalism and ethics parallel true Christianity. We know intuitively that being a veterinarian or physician is a life style, not just a job. We understand that we need to be always conscious of the fact that the eyes of the world are upon us, and we must be good representatives of the profession. We seem to be able to get this straight in the secular world, how is it that we Christians have so often missed this concept? It seems to me that it all gets back down to the need for me to apply my faith to all of my life, not just the things that are tangible to others. I need to be a full time Christian, a professional- always conscious that the eyes of the world are upon me, and thus acting in a manner that always brings glory to the Author of my profession- the Lord Jesus Christ. Becoming a professional Veterinarian is intensely exciting to me, but I have derived a great lesson out of my training- I hope you will take it to heart as well. People today don't need more preaching, we've been too hypocritical for too long for that to work by itself anymore- people need to see us act like we talk... be true professional Christians, 100%, 24 hours per day, 365 days per year sons and daughters of God. Lets be real.

Grace and peace,
Ben

For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen...
...being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse.

This beautiful quote from the book of Romans pretty much sums up the way I feel tonight. I just got back from studying for my anatomy exam tomorrow and was thinking about some things that have been running through my mind lately. I am so in awe of the amazing design I see wherever I look. I'm studying anatomy this semester in all it's forms (heh). Whether I am studying the gross anatomy, microscopic anatomy, or molecular anatomy the evidence for creation is simply astounding. Everything is so perfectly arranged and laid out, so indicative of a loving caring designer... I can say with absolute confidence that it is truly the fool that has said in his heart that there is no God. From the beautiful complexity of the actin /myosin muscle contractile system to the incredible depth of thought behind the structure of the synovial joint, to the wondrous
functionality of the flexor and extensor system of the pelvic limb... I find myself interrupting my own thoughts with outbursts of praise for our great God. I am simply in Awe... what a mighty God we serve.

Praising my Savior,
~Ben

Back from the links...
Heh, no I don't golf... but I do a bit of HTML, you'd better hop on over to the links page and check out the latest additions.

I just got back from my good friend's the Pauls (of Paul's grains fame- see their website here) We had a great time of fellowship, teaching, prayer, and praise. We were talking about what it means to lay up treasure in heaven rather than here on earth. It is good to be reminded of the need to keep our priorities in order, this earth is not our home, we're only passing through. But we need to be obedient while we're here. May we all walk by faith rather than by sight.

I hope you all had a wonderful Sunday, I know I did.
Till next time,
~Ben

I'm full of it.
Have you ever had the feeling that your head could not hold anymore information than what you had crammed into it? Thats about the point I'm getting to I think. I just spent three hours learning the bones (and intricacies thereof) of the thoracic (front) limbs of the dog... anatomy is fun... I must remember this. Actually it's not that bad a lot of the terms are familiar to me because of my exposure to the cat in comparative chordate morphology (wow, I guess all things really do work together for good...lol), so in most cases it's more a matter of bringing out the old information from the shelves at the back of my mind.

I have recently realized that there is indeed an inverse relationship between the level of sleep need and information storage capacity... in other words, as I need more sleep, I can learn less at a given time. As it is, I feel like I'm oozing anatomy... you know it's bad when you answer the phone and almost say "Hello, greater humoral tuberosity". I guess I should take my own advice and go to bed. What an amazing thing the mind is.

I'm looking forward to starting my new job in the morning (heh... need sleep), I'll let you all know how it goes on the first day. But until then... it is time for bed.

Pleasant dreams...
~Ben

Updates... updates.
It's a perfectly gorgeous early autumn morning in Ames... the temperature is perfect (i.e. cool!), the birds are singing, the sun is shining, and I don't have another class until one o'clock (grin). God is good.

Thanks to the astounding abilities and tutelage of my web designing guru friend David (thanks man), I've posted a couple of new articles to the website, they are both modified versions of papers I did for my comparative chordate morphology class last year. I got into several interesting discussions with my teacher over these papers, as you might imagine she didn't appreciate my even suggesting that evolution should be questioned... heh heh. None are so blind as those that will not see. You'd better have a look for yourself. More to come soon.... and pictures (yaay).

Hope you all have a beautiful day.
~Ben

Along the way...
I was encouraged to talk with my friend Nathaniel Bluedorn tonight, one of the things that we talked about was how it's good to see God opening doors like He said He would if we were in His will.I mentioned the verse in Genesis (24:27) where Abraham's servant comments on how God led him as he was obedient... I've experienced this same thing, it's so good to see that God really is true to His promises! The major reason why I was thinking about this was because of my new job. I had applied for work at the veterinary hospital. For a variety of reasons (the hours they wanted me to work were not compatible with either sleep or a college career ;^) ) I had not gotten a job yet.

I walk through the Diagnostic lab each day on my way home and the other day as I was passing the admin offices I felt like the Lord was leading me to stop by and talk with the receptionist. So I did... I told her that I was a first year student with almost 4 years of experience as a veterinary assistant and had a lot of experience with swine production... she was so surprised. Here not five minutes previous to our conversation she had talked to the lady in charge of getting announcements to our class about a position in their department for... guess what... a first year student with experience with veterinary assisting and swine production. I'm sorry, I don't believe in coincidences... God is soooo good.

Anyway... I'm basically going to be the resident vet assistant for the veterinary diagnostic lab, the vet extension service, and the production animal medicine department... and I don't have to work any weekends, holidays, or after hours! To God be the glory!

So...I am two days from the end of my second week of veterinary school! It still seems so strange, I've been plotting, planning, and persevering for nearly five years now- it's taking me a while to realize that I'm actually here... I'M ACTUALLY HERE! (sorry, thats just what it feels like :^) ). I'm getting used to the new schedule finally, and I'm actually reasonably proficient with navigating the labyrinth of hallways and rooms that make up the vet school /teaching hospital /diagnostic lab complex. I'm waiting somewhat patiently for my new screen for my palm pilot to come, I somehow annihilated the old one- I'm about half crazy without it... it's a wonder I haven't forgotten anything yet. Wait... if I have forgotten something, how would I know about it... arrrrrrghhhhh (please come soon palm screen...).

I was feeling rather overwhelmed immediately after orientation... it's interesting to look back and see how much I've adjusted even after two weeks... here's a portion of my journal recording some of my thoughts after our two day orientation was finished...I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed with the vast amounts of information I've had to attempt to process today, I feel almost exactly like I did after my NDSU orientation- like I just wanted to go home to mom and dad and forget about all school related activities for a while. I didn't feel ready to handle it, I don't feel ready to handle it.

But I did handle it then, and I will now. I guess some things never change. I well remember lying on the seat in our van as Dad drove mom and I back home from Fargo, I had a rather strange mix of emotions, somewhat awestruck that I was actually going to be a college student, happy that the Lord was opening doors for me to walk through, sad that I would be leaving my family, scared of the prospect of so much change… the list goes on. The weird thing is that I have much the same mix now, I thought it would be easier, it isn't. To a certain extent I think it is harder this go around, I feel almost like I'm grieving something- part of my life has ended, a new chapter has begun. As Jeanette (my boss at the vet clinic) said the day before I left- "a happy-sad feeling". I know that this is God's will for me to do right now, and I know that I am in the center of His will… I just wish the transition weren't so difficult. Oh I know it will get easier, I know that I will laugh about this in a year or so, I know that I'll feel silly for having gotten so emotional, but it's hard right now… just as it was when I began my undergraduate courses. Change is never easy, so many people have said this before, I've said it myself many times, but it is nonetheless true… human nature craves stability… controllability. As daring as some seem, we all want life to be predictable to some extent. Yes this is partially due to individual personality, but I think that it shows a larger subliminal realization on the part of all humans that we are indeed fallible… helpless… vulnerable… This should not be reason for despair though… far to the contrary… this should be vast reason for turning to God for our every need… we are incomplete without Him, as incomplete as a computer would be without an operator, a scalpel without a surgeon, a pen without a hand, a car without a driver- Man was never intended to function on his own, the missing link is the One who made the chain in the first place… our loving Creator. How easy this is to say, how hard it is to practice. Like so many things this is far easier to theorize about rather than implement… it is nonetheless necessary to a happy fulfilled life. How else could Paul state that he had learned that in whatever state he found himself therein would he be content? By realizing his dependence on Jesus, by acknowledging that His grace was sufficient, but knowing that through his weakness His strength is perfected, we are able to live lives exhibiting the peace and single mindedness that should be characterized by a mind stayed on the everlasting lover of our souls."

I must say that I'm feeling quite a bit better now, it's still a little difficult though... it's easier when I'm busy. It sure is good to know that God is in control. In other exciting news, watch for some new stuff here soon, I have several articles that I will be posting, along with some more
pictures... I just have to get them uploaded :^S.

Enough for tonight... time for sleep.
Grace and peace,
Ben

Rolling rolling rolling...
Well, the time has finally come... I'm moving. The summer term has come to an end and I am done with finals. Yaaay. Actually it does feel good to be done, this week has just been rather crazy- between finals, work, and trying to get everything packed and the apartment cleaned I think I've met myself coming and going many times already. I never dreamed that moving would be this much work! I have been joking with people that I moved in here in the trunk of a car, and am moving out in a 3/4 ton truck and a horse trailer! It is simply amazing how much stuff one guy can accumulate over just 2 short years! My brothers and a friend of mine are going to come and help me move, we have some work to do on my new place as well- it's always nice to have good help! Ah well... I just figured I'd let you all know I'd be gone for a while, I'm heading back north after I
move my things- back to work until classes start. Thats the way the money comes :^). Have a great remainder of the summer- I'll post again when I'm near ye old desk weight again.

Grace and peace,
Ben

Dogma... blarg.
Why do people feel it necessary to resort to dogmaticism when they think something is important? I've been thinking on this a lot lately. It's rather difficult to talk to a dogmatic person, in my experience at least. Take for instance doctrinal differences based on differing interpretation of scripture... fruitful discussion is basically doomed once dogma gets introduced... the argument is almost immediately reduced to the level of "is too!"... "is not!"... "IS TOO!"..."IS NO.. you get the point. I've seen this a lot among Christians discussing such subjects as Calvinism (or any of the "reformed" ideas) The discussion gets going good... with measured responses backed soundly with much good exegesis and study... then the dogmaticist comes along "God is by no means subject to the whims of man... every man is dead in his sins...etc." I don't necessarily disagree with these comments, but a statement like that one just puts a good edifying chat to death. The trouble is, if I say anything about not being so dogmatic... my entreaty is taken to mean that I don't think the subject is important. See the dilemma? The issue is not that we shouldn't discuss controversial topics... the issue is how we discuss them! How true was James: "But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy." James 3:17

When it comes right down to it, truth is true regardless of what we say... if something is true it cannot be proven false. Perhaps people resort to dogma because they have an indwelling fear that what they believe will be proven wrong... I'm not sure, but I suspect this is a factor. The only objective measure of truth that we have on this earth is the Scripture, thus it alone should be our standard. My point is that no matter how correct we may think a creed, commentary, or confession is... aside from their use for our own personal benefit we should not rely on anything but God's word for our discussion proofs.

Sola Scriptura!
~Ben

Culinary incompetency!
Ok, so I'm sitting through yet another Etiology lecture and we're talking about causative factors in food borne illness... My instructor was listing several for our listening enjoyment. Then she dropped the bomb- "according to our studies a major cause of personal food contamination is gender related culinary incompetence among collegians"... In other words, college age men simply can't cook. Needless to say the class found this comment greatly hilarious... what a blow. Then again, I am in a definite minority as a male (especially one that can cook- heh), by far the fair sex is more common in my major than my own gender. I guess this will be no different at vet school this fall... I'm told that I'll be one of about 8 men in a class of 105! Sigh... sometimes I feel downright outnumbered.

All fun aside, this really is turning out to be a fun summer. No... really, I'm not being sarcastic anymore- I really am enjoying this semester. Food safety has changed my life... whoever would have thought of food thermometers!? To think that I could have gone my entire life without knowing what "mechanically separated turkey" is (trust me, I've been to the processing plant... you don't want to know). To never realize how many workers actually return from the bathroom to prepare my salad without washing their hands... its enough to make some folks paranoid. No wonder microbiologists are as a rule nutty as fruitcakes ;^). I really am learning a lot though, I thank God for allowing me to take advantage of this opportunity... truly all things work together for our good. Enough for tonight... tis time for sleep.
~Ben

Well... for those of you who were wondering, I'm not dead, dying, or otherwise incapacitated- I just haven't had access to a computer with ftp for the last while.
Life is going great, God is good. I'm now in Fargo again, hard at summer courses. I'm finishing my minor in food safety right now- I have three classes and a lab... my last "fling" at NDSU I guess... heh. Work was fun, being a vet assistant has taken on new meaning now that I'm for sure going to vet school... it's going to be a fun four years! I've found a place to live in Ames... I bought a little place near campus... long story, but needless to say- I thank God for His guiding hand, I know that this is His will for me right now.

I had a rather strange experience at Lowes tonight; I was buying some boards to finish up a book shelf I made for my growing library this weekend (sigh, the perils of "bookwormery" I guess ;^) ) and rather than get cut the boards myself, I found three that were the right length and one that had to be shortened a bit. Well, I hunted about for a while to locate an associate- to no avail. Finally I headed over to the department desk and had them page someone ( I guess the two workers sitting at said desk found their conversation too interesting to cut off- heh). Well, suffice it to say that I am reasonably certain that I could have chewed the board off in less time than it took those four (yes I said four) workers to make the cut with that beautiful saw (with all the step by step instructions). I was able to do all my other shopping (about a half hour's worth) and when I came back the lady was just setting the board on the counter. Of course they cut the first two boards to the wrong lengths- sigh. Now I am usually a rather patient person when it comes to things like this, but this one even had me wondering. Sigh, I guess thats what I get for waiting for 5 o'clock on a Sunday evening to finish my project. I'm glad I don't manage a Lowes. Enough for tonight... brain is quickly losing touch with fingers. Hoping to update more frequently (HA!),
~Ben

Wow what a week! My instructors are lecturing like mad to try to finish all the material in time for finals week- it's hard to believe that I only have one more week of classes after this one! This will be a different finals week for me than any other I have ever known- because it will be my LAST at NDSU!! Thats right, I'm finishing my last regular semester- I was notified last week that I have been accepted to vet school! I will be heading down to Ames Iowa in late august to enter the freshman class of 2007 at Iowa State University College of Veterinary Medicine.

I'm really excited about this new development in my life- I love to watch God work! I was almost a little worried (ok, more than a little worried ;^) ) when I was placed on the alternate list, but I can see know how God was wanting me to stretch my faith yet a little more. Sometimes I'm
not very patient- I often find it difficult to just wait on the Lord, but praise Him for His wondrous love that works all things together for our good! I'm looking right now for a house in the area around Ames- I would prefer a farmstead of some sort- if you know of anything please get in touch with me!

It appears that with my experience as a vet assistant I'll be able to enter a position at the vet school, I'm very happy about this- it's work that I enjoy, and it pays reasonably well. In other, more mundane news (heh- not really mundane- I'm just pumped about going to vet school (as if you
couldn't tell :^P )) our family is getting a cow. We are purchasing a 3 year old registered purebred Jersey cow to provide milk for our family's growing cheese making habit- we're picking her up this Saturday. I'll post pictures soon. Ah well... time for sleep.
Till we meet again...
~Ben

Hosanna, Christ is King! I had a wonderful Palm Sunday back home on the northern prairies- it was a very restful weekend, exactly what I needed! I've been running at such a frantic pace here recently, it seemed at times that I was meeting myself coming and going! It's now Sunday evening- and I'm up past my bedtime again- but I had to share a few thoughts yet tonight while they're still on my mind.

We were studying Ephesians 4 today in our men's meeting, and we were talking about verse 1 where Paul talks about walking "...worthy of the vocation wherein ye are called". A few interesting thoughts came out of our discussion. I thought of an analogy in regards to the term "vocation", in our modern world, physicians must go through a very rigorous education and examination in order to practice medicine, they are required to be qualified in order to treat patients or even dispense advice. Our modern minds find the concept of a person practicing medicine who is not a doctor absolutely abhorrent, those who would irresponsibly play with so valuable a charge should be fined, and hopefully locked up. Essentially, we expect people to "walk worthy of their vocation". In other words, we expect people to be true to what they know. Doctors should practice medicine, not Law, your accountant should do your taxes, not your tooth filling.

You see, this verse is talking about the very same idea. We are no longer slaves to sin, we have been crucified with Christ and our lives are hidden with Christ in God. In the book of Romans, Paul asks the question: "How shall we that are dead to sin continue any longer therein?" The question is not why would you, but how could you. The assumption is that Christians do not sin. Again in Ephesians 4:17, Paul exhorts us to refrain from acting as those of the world, in the "vanity of their mind". We need to realize that the idea of a Christian sinning should be as unnatural and horrible to us as the concept of a plumber taking out your gall bladder- we are crucified, buried, raised, and glorified with Christ, new creatures in our glorious Lord. This doesn't mean that we will not make mistakes, but there is a vast difference between the cat and the pig. One may slip and fall into the mud, but he gets up and quickly cleans himself off (the idea of staying dirty is unnatural and disgusting), the other just lays down and wallows. Our mind set should be such that we will never sin again- if we slip, we do have an advocate with the Father, but we are called to strive to be like Christ.

Dear reader, as we enter this season of remembrance and celebration I exhort you to remember what Christ has done for you and me. May we all realize more fully the depth and breadth of the boundless mercy and grace of our Lord and Saviour. "He paid a debt he did not owe, I owed a debt I could not pay". "Thanks be unto God for His unspeakable gift."
Grace and peace,
~Ben

Hello again, wonder of wonders, I actually am updating this thing relatively regularly! Lots to talk about since the last time we chatted, I'll probably hit on the high points for now- almost bed time (I'm jealously guarding it now).

On a good news note, I have been accepted as an alternate for admission to the fall of 2003 (next fall) class at the college of veterinary medicine at Iowa State University in Ames! Now you may be wondering, "what does it mean to be an 'alternate'?", well, basically, since I'm a ND resident I'm not as high priority as an Iowa resident. Since there were more than enough Iowa residents for the class, I get put on the alternate list. However, I am number 4 on the list, so I'm told that my chances for getting in this fall are extremely good, given the fact that hardly any students only apply to just one school (i.e. many students may be accepted at more than one school). It would be rather ironic if I got in this year, given the fact that both the Veterinarians at the practice where I work were accepted to ISU as alternates! I can be notified any time from now till the first week of classes. God is good though, I trust Him completely- if I'm supposed to go to vet school, He'll see to it. If I'm not, I don't want anything to do with it- His will is best!

Had an interesting experience in Ames, I had emailed the vet school before leaving Fargo in regards to setting up a tour while I was in Des Moines (Ames is only about 25 miles north of Des Moines) and had received a reply telling me that they didn't give any tours during Spring Break. I had resigned myself to this, but being as we were so close to the school, my friend and I decided to drive up there and get a bit of a feel for the city and the school- perhaps find a few brochures, etc. I was walking up to the main entrance when we met an older gentleman coming out of the building. I asked him if he knew where the vet med administration offices were. He looked at me kind of funny and replied that he did and that he could show us. As we were walking he was asking me where I was from and what I was doing there- I told him we were from ND and that we were after pamphlets, he looked astonished and asked if we had driven all the way from ND just for brochures! I filled him in on the situation, to which he replied "awe forget that.. I'll show you guys around, we like ND boys here, besides, if anyone should know the school I should".

Before we knew it, we were being shown all over the school- about an hour later the man looked down at his watch and remarked that he had to run to a meeting, but that we were welcome to continue looking around. I figured I'd run into him again, so I asked if he were a professor there- he laughed and replied that he was the DEAN! Heh, I'm still chuckling over the Lord's sense of humor- here I was after brochures and I got a personal tour of the school by the dean of the college! We had many other fun experiences- not the least of which was my initiation to the world of caving :^S I got to see old friends, meet some new ones, and learned many new things- hopefully I'll have more time to write on all this later. I am so blessed to have such great friends.

Well, I guess thats about all for now, I've uploaded some of the pictures from my trip to the server- look for them real soon!
Carpe Deum
~Ben

My goodness, it's been a long time since I've written anything here! No I haven't lost interest, I've just been reeealy busy (does it seem like I say that a lot? heh).

I just got back from my big trip to Des Moines, I think I'm finally falling back into the stride of things. My conference went well, I took 2nd place in the midwestern section undergraduate research competition- more on the trip later. I have lots of pictures, some of which will hopefully be on this
website soon- stop back and check in the near future.

School is going well, keeping me hopping as usual ;^) Ah well, now I'm rambling- guess I'll sign off for now.
Grace and peace,
Ben

Ah the wonderful head long dash of academia... I'm in the midst of my third week back at university- I'm keeping veeeery busy! Between my 20 credits, part time job, and studies, I manage to find enough activities to occupy my time. ;^) Financial aid dispersal finally went through, it's always nice to have money. (now if I didn't have all these bills... sigh- do you people have any idea how much more money I'd have if I didn't need to eat?!) Other news: I changed the format of this news thing so hopefully it will be easier to read (less scrolling). I just got over a rather nasty bout with some upper respiratory tract virus- I still don't remember all the details of last week thanks to the plugged head I had. Well, I guess thats about all for now. Till next time, ~Ben

Well the new year's here! It's been a great break, I've enjoyed my work at the clinic, but... back to the grindstone! I'm back in Fargo gearing up for another semester starting tomorrow. I've purchased all my books (oij... they certainly are making a few bucks from my account), now all thats left is to get organized. I do think that it's become a little easier to go back to the routine of classes each time I do it, this is now my seventh semester, so I guess I should be getting used to it by now! Fargo is beautiful this time of year, although it's cold the fresh snow gives everything a glorious new finish. In other news, I had all sorts of new experiences over my break working as a veterinary assistant. A couple of high points: I learned to do dental cleanings for cats and dogs, lots of fun- but hard on the hands! I got kicked in the head by a wrathful calf (I had just finished stopping it's bleeding from a faulty castration attempt), in a way I'm glad it finally happened- I always kind of wondered what my reaction would be the first time it happened. Would I sit on the ground and bawl? Would I jump up and kick the cow? Or would I struggle back to my feet and finish the job? Well, I'm pleased to note that, after getting my breath back and allowing my brain to resume normal function, I got back up and finished my job ;^) . (ha ha, I decided I should be able to think twice as well with all those cobwebs nocked from my head). I should hasten to note that there was no lasting damage (I think, lol), I'm thankful for the Lord's protection! Well, thats all for now- I hope you all have a wonderfull new year!
~Ben

Merry Christmas!!! I'm now back home on the frozen north eastern prairies of North Dakota for my Christmas break. It is only about one degree above zero right now, with a -18 windchill... brrr- feels good to be indoors! It's good to be able to have some time to relax for a change- the stress of the last few weeks was getting to me more than I realized. I'm working full time at the veterinary clinic, the extra cash will come in handy with my coming big purchase... I am getting a new (to me) truck! It's a 1990 Dodge Ram 3/4 ton with a turbo diesle engine and four wheel drive. I challenge any drift to stop me now! lol. I'll try to post pictures when I get a chance. Today more than usual I have been made aware of how faithful God is. He has been so good this past year- at the end of 2002 I'm reminded again of His wonderful providance in each and every one of our lives. As we celebrate our great God's provision for our Salvation, may we be ever more mindfull of His tender mercies and wondrous grace through out the rest of this year and into the next.
May you have a wonderful Christmas and many more blessings in the New Year!
~Ben

It's just amazing that I'm already updating this site. Quite a change from my behavior on the old site, eh? (Those of you old timers who made the change of servers with me and still look at this page know exactly what I'm talking about- lol) It's a sloppy slurpy day here in the little city on the prairie, we should be getting scads of snow (in the opinion of my brother- who snowmobiles), but the temperature is hovering around freezing and as a result we have more of a slushy mess than anything else. Andrew and I watched a movie the other night called "a beautiful mind" chronicling the life of schizophrenic mathematician John Nash. I have to say that it was one of the more disturbing films I've ever seen. The quite realistic delving into John's paranoid hallucinations speak to a deep dark fear that I think all humans have realized at one point or another. The film did get me thinking though. When you come right down to it, the horror of insanity is based ultimately upon our innate knowledge of fleshly frailty. Indeed if one believes that we are "all there is", mental insanity means nothing more than loss of control over reality. This can only lead to despair. Ina universe with no factual basis (an impossibility in and of itself), insanity is not a faint possibility, but an imminent certainty. If there is no basis for fact, there can be no basis for reality. Indeed this is the reason why so many philosophers and scientists have fallen from sanity. Indeed it is the fool who has said in his heart that there is no God, to deny Him is to deny reality at its base. Although I cannot quite say that I am glad I watched this movie, I can say that it has served to drive further home the great truth of Scripture: "what shall it profit a man if he gain the whole world and lose his own soul?" God is faithful, His promises are sure. It is with a grateful heart and awe struck mind that I continue to serve Him.

What a beautiful morning! God has once again blessed us with a lovely new coat of which fluffy snow here in the little city on the prarie. seeing the beauty in nature I am only reminded again of the psalmist's praise: "the heavens declare the glory of God, and the earth shows forth His handiwork"!
God is so good, days like today help me to be more aware of His faithfulness and loving wisdom that works all things together for our good!

Well, for better or worse, I am now able to make updates to this cool new website. Thanks to my friend david, I am able to navigate the strange and weird (mostly because I have no clue what I'm doing) corridors of HTML.

I'm into the thick of finals week here at NDSU, so if I seem preoccupied, it's because I am, (smile)
I have already taken two exams this week, now I have nothing (heh) to do but study till friday when I will have two mega finals one right after the other; biochemistry at 7:30 (aaaa) and organic chemistry (the course which I'm challenging) at 10.

Well, thats all for now.

Till next time,
Grace and peace in our Lord and risen Saviour.
~Ben

Hello again! After numerous problems with the "freeservers" server and through the kind graces of my friend David Hepworth (see his design service at www.flagmandesign.com) I am moving operations to a NEW WEBSITE! The new site will be much improved (without popups !!! yaaay!)

Well, the newest thing right now is this website- hope you enjoy it!